Yep, that would be my choice too. Looking at that ’91 makes me miss my ’89 Coupe DeVille. That was just too damn big, but this Eldorado looks just right. And I prefer that earlier square-jawed style. It’s going to make somebody a nice cheap ride, that one. So… Boats. I’ll come right out and say it, I’m a little out of my depth [Editor’s Note: I GET IT! – JT] here. Most of these columns I can sail through without a whole lot of research, but this time I can’t just float along. [Editor’s Note: Oh there’s more – JT]  I need to navigate some unknown waters today, and I hope those who know better what they’re talking about will show me a little patience as I learn the ropes. [Editor’s Note: Oh god – JT] With that said, let’s get our feet wet – possibly literally. Both of these boats are made by Bayliner, who, as I understand it, had a reputation for some pretty cheap shoddy materials and workmanship early on. But like any “cheap” product, they have their devoted followers, willing to put in the work to turn them into something respectable. But because of the bad reputation, they often sell cheap, even the nice ones. Basically, they’re the shitboxes of the boat world, which makes them perfect for us.

1977 Bayliner Mosquito – $1,600

Engine: 85 hp Mercury 4 cylinder 2 stroke outboard Location: Portland, OR Length: 17 ft Condition: Good, no leaks, engine runs but has a miss This would appear to be it: the least amount you can spend for a pleasure boat that is intact and has a hope of being seaworthy. It has a fiberglass hull and an 85 horsepower outboard motor. As is common for outboard boat engines, this is a 2 stroke engine. The reasons for this are that boats don’t need a lot of  torque, but top-end horsepower is useful. (Snowmobiles are usually 2 strokes for the same reason.) 2 stroke engines are also smaller and lighter than 4 stroke engines, which is important when you have to swing the whole engine back and forth to steer, and pick it up out of the water when you’re done.

This particular Mercury outboard is having some issues; the seller says it runs, but “something is just off.” There aren’t a lot of moving parts in a 2-stroke motor, no valves or camshafts, so the list of potential trouble spots is few. But finding parts for a 45-year-old boat motor might not be the easiest thing, and replacement outboards aren’t cheap.

Apart from the engine issues, it doesn’t look too bad for a $1600 boat. The seller lists a lot of recent work done, including work on the included trailer. It sounds like it might have been in storage for a while, and if the engine wasn’t put into storage properly, that could account for its problems now.

Boats are not a cheap hobby, but if the price of entry is this low, this could be a good way to dabble without having to commit to too much expense. And chances are, if the engine isn’t fixable, you can move it on to another owner for the same price.  

1970 Bayliner Runabout – $2,700

Engine: 105 hp Chrysler 4 cylinder 2 stroke outboard Location: Portland, OR Length: 17 ft Condition: Great! Ready to go Raise your hand if you knew that Chrysler Coropration was once a giant in the boating industry. That’s what I figured. Chrysler Marine fell victim to the corporation’s money troubles in the late 1970s, and was sold off piecemeal to other companies in the early ’80s. But in the 1960s and ’70s, Chrysler boats and boat engines were huge.

This 1970 Bayliner would have been a competitor to Chrysler’s speedboats, but it shares the same 2 stroke outboard motor. Chrysler boat motors were highly regarded and very reliable, and this one has been gone over carefully, and according to the seller, runs like a top.

The rest of this boat has been well cared-for as well, and it shows. A long list of recent repairs and maintenance is listed in the ad, and it comes with a whole assortment of extras, including the all-important cover. These old Bayliner boats have fiberglass hulls, but wooden decks and structure, so it’s important to keep them out of the elements when they’re not supposed to get wet.

I have to be honest: I really dig this boat. I have no idea if it’s actually a good deal or not, but it sure seems to be. I can see myself putting on a Hawaiian shirt and my straw trilby, playing a little Herb Alpert on the sound system, and puttering up to the marina bar at happy hour. (I don’t know why it has to be Herb Alpert, but it does.) And that’s the problem with looking at cheap boats; they put all kinds of bad ideas in your head. Everybody knows you don’t really want a boat anyway – you want a friend with a boat. But for these prices, you could probably learn that lesson first-hand and not lose too much in the process. So if you’re going to make this particular mistake, which one is it going to be?   QuizMaker In reality, whichever one doesn’t have rotten flooring or other wood parts would be the one to choose, and you have to do an on-site inspection for that. Currently have two sailboats, only one with a motor, and they take enough money to maintain, run, and store. The one without a motor was inherited and I’ve still spent over $1500 refitting the trailer, epoxy repairs, and replacing worn items. “Free boat with a history and connection, you should take it” she said 3 years and a cross-country trip ago. “That boat is just sitting there costing us money” she now says. These old boats and motors would suck so much more time to get and keep them ready for the water than you’ll ever spend actually on the water. You also don’t use it nearly as often as you think you will, especially not after the first year or two when the honeymoon period wears off. Grew up on a lake and we had an old Chrysler outboard of this era for a while that was the least reliable we ever had, and my dad scrounged up some pretty unreliable crap. New motor for either boat will set you back more than double the initial cost, and that’s for something under 30hp just to get you around the lake and maybe pull a smaller kid tubing. The only way you’d want to pick up either of these is if you have a David Tracy level of commitment to old Bayliners. Wait, has Torchinsky repaid DT’s truck gift yet? I’ll paddle, thank you! I know SO MANY local gearheads that picked up boats from that era who thought it was an easy way into a fun summer on the water only to end up scrapping or spending WAY more than it was worth because the wood under the fiberglass was rotted out making it a noodly mess or the ‘glass was delaminated from UV damage. Boats are money pits when they’re in good shape; old tubs doubly so. Fiberglass and wood aren’t really all that hard to work with; it’s just time consuming, messy and unfamiliar to most people, so they just don’t try. That’s why you can find so many cheap boats around. Also, the Merc is a much better motor to have. Parts shouldn’t be too hard to find, even for one this old. The Chrysler should be just fine, as long as you don’t go over 90% throttle very often. But the thing is, almost every boater runs wide open throttle pretty often. …you can call it the “Merc Tucker Torpedo.” ducks flying tomatoes

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